


Paradox

by moccatoccata



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Drama, M/M, idk what to tag this anymore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-12
Updated: 2016-01-12
Packaged: 2018-05-13 10:52:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5704918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moccatoccata/pseuds/moccatoccata
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I’m sorry for making you worry, I’m sorry for not being able to say anything, I’m sorry for loving you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Paradox

**Author's Note:**

> hi! mocca's here with another fic and this time it's for a new fandom, GOT7! I completely blame jackbum for this because they just make me want to write a fic about them. as usual it's unbetaed and actually were written in the middle of the night so please do tell me if there's mistakes or anything. thanks in advance for reading! comments and kudos are much appreciated! see you again soon, guys~

Jackson was numb. He had to really push himself throughout his trek home and now that he had reached the living room of his shared apartment, he almost couldn’t feel anything anymore. Jackson wondered if it was because of the blood loss or his broken rib. It would heal, Jackson wasn’t an ordinary human anyway, but he needed to reach his bed and Jackson didn’t have the strength to do so. He laid his body on the couch, mentally groaning at the blood stain he would have to clean later but his eyes were starting to close. Jackson was grateful that his housemate was visiting his parents over the weekend so he wouldn’t be able to witness Jackson, stained with blood and bruised all over his body, passed out on the couch. His mind slowly succumbed to darkness and the last thing that Jackson heard was the sound of the door being opened.

Jackson woke up to cold sensation on his forehead and he groaned. His body gradually becoming awake and he still felt pain, albeit it was reduced to a dull throb now. He heard someone speaking but Jackson wasn’t able to fully comprehend it yet.

“—son, are you alright?”

All he was able to let out was a grumble as the cold sensation on his forehead disappeared Jackson wondered what it was but his eyes felt sticky and he couldn’t open it. He tried to communicate with that someone but his mouth wasn’t able to work well.

“It’s okay, I’ll help you,” was what Jackson heard before he felt pressure and his eyes were being opened by someone. The room was dim and Jackson was thankful to whoever it was that was taking care of him right now. His eyes finally registered that he was in his own room and that someone was sitting beside his bed. He blinked once and twice before realizing who it was. “Jaebum  _ hyung _ ?”

“I’m here, Jackson,” Jaebum’s voice was soft. “Does it still hurt?”

“No,” Jackson croaked, his throat felt thirsty. “Drink.”

He saw Jaebum nodded and then he felt his body was being supported to sit up. He winced when a sharp pain flared on his left side and Jaebum seemed to realize that. The older kept apologizing as he positioned Jackson so that he was leaning on his pillow, fetching Jackson water after he finished. Jackson was glad Jaebum gave him straw to drink for because too much water probably wasn’t good for his body now.

“Finished?” he asked after Jackson released his straw to which the younger replied with a nod. Jaebum put the glass back to the bedside table before sitting on his chair again. His expression was unclear in the dimmed room but Jackson could trace worry there.

“What happened?” the question made Jackson sigh and closed his eyes. He, to be honest, wouldn’t be able to explain this to Jaebum if he didn’t want to risk Jaebum knew about his second identity. The media might have broadcasted about the earlier events right now and even though he wore his cover, Jackson couldn’t take a risk.

Not when Jaebum was part of ‘heroes’.

“Jackson?” he heard Jaebum asked again. “Are you alright?”

Jackson mustered his energy to smile but it looked like it didn’t satisfy Jaebum at all because the older frowned. Jackson felt his smile disappeared as well before he answered. “I’m okay, Jaebum  _ hyung _ . Just a little tired.”

Jaebum was silent, Jackson could feel his eyes running through Jackson’s body, searching for something that Jackson didn’t know but his gesture stopped and Jaebum’s body slumped. Jackson didn’t even realize that he was tense before.

He reached for Jackson’s curled hand and enveloped it with both of his hands. Jackson shivered at the sensation and he felt another kind of burn in his chest. This was stupid, Jackson needed to stop.

“I was scared. I was just entering the apartment and I found you … lying there…” Jaebum’s mouth formed a thin line and there was helplessness in his tone that made Jackson feel guilty. He wanted to say something, anything but it would destroy everything that he had tried to protect all these years and even if he wasn’t able to get Jaebum’s love, Jackson still wanted to be his friend.

Jackson was ‘villains’ who dared to love ‘heroes’. 

“Please, Jackson. I know you hate it when I’m being too protective but know that I’m here for you, okay?” Jackson felt tears started to form in his eyes. “I’m just a phone call away. You can always count on me, Jackson.”

“I’m sorry,” whispered Jackson; his voice was thick with emotions. I’m sorry for making you worry, I’m sorry for not being able to say anything, I’m sorry for loving you.

Jaebum raised his hand to brush something on Jackson’s cheeks and it was then that he realized he was crying. Jackson started to sob. It hurt, his rib hadn’t healed completely but Jackson gladly received the pain as he let out everything that had built up inside of him. He felt Jaebum’s arms circled his body gently and Jackson felt warm. He felt secure. He felt loved but it only made him sick. He didn’t deserve any kindness from Jaebum.

“I wish I could help you back then,” Jaebum’s fingers were running through his hair. “I wish I was there so I could beat them up for you.” His grip on Jackson’s body tightened slightly.

Jackson tried to speak between his cries. “I-It wasn’t yo-your fault,  _ hyung _ . I was being ca-careless.”

“It was never your fault,” muttered Jaebum, his fingers kept running through Jackson’s hair and his other hand was making a circle motion on Jackson’s back in an attempt to calm the younger down. They stayed in that position, not talking, until Jackson’s sobs turned to small hiccups and his tears started to dry up.

Jaebum released his hold and Jackson unconsciously whined. He felt his face was burned when Jaebum chuckled. “I’m going to get tissues for you, Jackson. I’m not going anywhere.”

Jackson nodded and Jaebum lightly ruffled his hair before exiting the room in search for tissues. It gave Jackson time to think about what had happened and whether he should keep staying here as Jaebum’s housemate or moving out as what Youngjae had suggested a month ago.

_ “You’ll keep hurting yourself,  _ hyung _ ,” said Youngjae. “Even if no one publicly announced what his status is in this world, no one knows what will happen in the long run, what will happen if he knew about who you are. You won’t survive if one day you’re pitted against him.” _

_ “And I don’t want to lose you,  _ hyung _ ,” Youngjae’s eyes were misty, “because of you loving our enemy.” _

Jaebum entered the room at that moment and Jackson was snapped out of his thoughts. His eyes met Jaebum’s and Jackson wondered what Jaebum saw because his eyes darkened but Jackson blinked and then it was gone.

“Did something trouble you?” Jaebum asked as he pulled some tissues out of the box and gave it to Jackson who quickly wiped his cheeks clean from tear stains. “Your face doesn’t look good.”

“It must be because I’m tired,  _ hyung _ ,” supplied Jackson. True to his words, he yawned. “My body needs to rest.”

Jaebum looked at him fondly. “Then sleep. I’m going to be right here beside you.”

“You shouldn’t,” murmured Jackson. His crying had sucked the energy out of him. “Sleep in your room,  _ hyung _ .”

“No, I’m not going anywhere.” said Jaebum as he maneuvered Jackson to a comfortable sleeping position. After he finished tucking Jackson in he added. “Now sleep.”

“So bossy,” mumbled Jackson. “I’m going to tell the college newspaper that the golden student, Im Jaebum, was a bossy bastard who forces his  _ dongsaeng _ to go to sleep.”

“You’re already rambling,” commented Jaebum. “Do I need to sing a lullaby for you for you to sleep?”

Jackson knew he was teasing but he really did want to hear Jaebum’s singing. “Mmhm. I promise I’ll sleep if you sing for me.”

“I wonder if I spoiled you too much,” Jaebum sighed but Jackson heard him singing a soft lullaby after. It made him feel warm and sleepy and without realizing it Jackson had fallen asleep.

The next morning, he managed to walk out to the living room and turned the tv on to catch up with the news only to find out that the ‘heroes’ who beaten him up the night before was found dead in their apartment. The police said the COD was drowning but the body was dry and there were no traces of water anywhere near them.

“We’re still looking but we’re eighty percent sure it wasn’t a ‘neutral’,” said the police.

Jackson was sure that he didn’t tell anyone yet about who assaulted him. Only Jaebum knew about his wounds but it still could pass as an ordinary attack by thugs.

_ “Maybe he’s not what you think he is _ ,” Jinyoung’s words entered his mind.  _ “Maybe he’s just like you, Jackson, hiding behind those façade.” _

“It’s impossible,” Jackson murmured into the empty living room. “Maybe there were others who hated them. Jaebum’s a ‘hero’. It’s impossible … for him to attack his kins.”

_ “I don’t think he’s a ‘hero’ like you, Youngjae and the rest of the world think. He had this strange vibe and …” _

Jinyoung was wrong. Jaebum was part of ‘heroes’; Jackson was sure. His kindness was sincere, unlike himself who laughed and cracking jokes everywhere to avoid people finding that he had burned families and had glee when doing it. Jackson would have known if someone’s was acting because he was an actor as well and he didn’t detect any of it when Jaebum smiled at children awkwardly, laugh at his friend’s jokes, when he always do a charity event every month or when Jaebum grinned; his eyes forming crescents that Jackson loved very much. Im Jaebum; their college’s golden student.

Jackson turned the TV off, not wanting to find out more.

  
  



End file.
